Marriage changes women’s lives—men’s, not so much. The data shows it.
The recently released data from the Time Use Survey shows marriages in India are not equal relationships between men and women when it comes to running the household.
For 28-year-old Reena Khoda, a mother of three, the day kicks off at 4 am. Before heading out for her house-help job, she has to ensure all the day’s cooking and cleaning is done. Tamanna Setia, 33, a cabin crew member with an Indian airline and a mother of two, usually starts her day by 6 am, or earlier if her job demands. As she flies to different cities and countries, she juggles everything at home - from house help and nannies to the endless needs of her four- and two-year-olds.
Khoda and Setia, and several Indian women, would have seen parts of their lives play out in the recent Hindi film Mrs. and its 2021 Malayalam original, the critically acclaimed The Great Indian Kitchen. The remake was an internet sensation, particularly among women, for its rather intense take on the realities of household management.
Both Khoda and Setia acknowledge that their husbands and in-laws provide necessary help, yet both feel managing the home remains primarily their responsibility. For Khoda, her job is a financial necessity; for Setia, it’s about independence. Both worry for their kids when away; both feel somewhat overwhelmed.
This is not just the story of two young married women with kids. It is a reality shared by millions of Indian women, as revealed in the Time Use Survey, a nationally representative government study that covered over 450,000 respondents.
The data shows how marriage, motherhood, and household responsibilities reshape a woman’s daily life -- dramatically and disproportionately -- compared to men. It helps sketch what a day in the life of the average Indian looks like, and why, despite greater educational access, women still struggle to translate learning into earning.
Part 1: The unpaid burden: For Indian women, degrees don’t ease household chores
Post-marriage, her world shifts
A Mint analysis of the survey’s data shows that marriage changes a woman’s life drastically, saddling her with unpaid household work. She spends about a fourth of her day on domestic duties - cooking, cleaning, caregiving, and more. That’s a striking contrast from the lives of unmarried girls and women, who spend only 6% of their time on such activities.
Now compare this with men. Unmarried boys and men spend 1% of their time on household work, which rises to just 3% after marriage.
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While unmarried women spend a significant share of time (23%) on ‘employment’ or ‘learning’ (i.e. earning and preparing to earn, respectively), this effort doesn’t translate into time spent on actual formal work after marriage. For men, the total time spent on employment and learning remains unchanged before and after marriage.
For married women who do go out to work, their “double shift"—one at work and then at home—is unmissable. All kinds of work—paid (employment and related activities) and unpaid (domestic labour for family)—together take men roughly 7 hours and 15 minutes in a day, while women spend 7 hours and 48 minutes. Remember, paid work usually comes with weekly offs and vacation time, while domestic chores can be a daily task without breaks.
Another shift happens if a marriage ends, through widowhood, divorce, or separation. While married women spend 388 minutes (6 hours and 28 minutes) on unpaid household chores, it comes down to half for widowed/divorced/separated women. For men, the opposite is true—as household burden strikes, the time spent on such tasks rises from 47 minutes to 79 minutes on average.
- Married Indian women spend a quarter of their day on unpaid household duties, a sharp increase from their pre-marriage lives and in stark contrast to men, who see minimal change in how they spend their day.
- Married women who work outside the home dedicate nearly 8 hours a day in total to both paid employment and unpaid domestic labour. The total for men is less.
- The data reveals a substantial gender gap in specific domestic activities, particularly food management and preparation (married women spend 3 hours 39 minutes vs. men's 4 minutes) and childcare.
- While unmarried girls and women show high participation in learning, this doesn't translate into equivalent participation in formal employment after marriage.
- The burden of unpaid domestic chores decreases for women whose marriages end (widowed/divorced/separated) but increases for men in similar circumstances.
The kitchen’s gender gap
The old saying “The way to a man's heart is through his stomach" is seared in reality, underlining how women can earn appreciation or love by cooking delicious meals, something both the films mentioned above highlighted.
As it turns out, women do dedicate the maximum of their waking-up hours to food management and preparation. (The first part of the story covered this; read here.) Married women spend 219 minutes (3 hours and 39 minutes) on this; men spend just 4 minutes.
The gender gap also exists for other activities under the ‘unpaid domestic and caregiving work’ category. On ‘childcare and instruction’, a major task, married women spend 66 minutes a day and married men 19 minutes.
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Employment is a significant activity where women lag men in time spent. The gap is 307 minutes. But if traditional gender roles require women’s work at home to balance men’s earning endeavours outside, it doesn’t play out that way: for the broad category of unpaid domestic and caregiving services, the gender gap is higher, tilted towards (rather, against) women (340 minutes).
Learning paradox: from studies to domestic chores
All figures in this analysis are averages covering all individuals, including those who do not engage in the said activity at all. When we zero in on only those who actually engage in these tasks, the story gets starker.
About 82% of women engage in domestic chores, and about a fourth in caregiving work at home. This, of course, is higher for married women, with a 98% and nearly 50% participation rate, respectively.
In comparison, only a third of married men participate in either of these activity categories. The participation rate in domestic chores is high (46%) even among single women and girls—for such boys and men, it’s 18%.
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But here’s where the break happens. Among unmarried girls and women, the participation rate in learning or studying is quite high (73%), even higher than such males (58%). However, this does not translate into a higher participation rate in employment post-marriage: 25% for women, against 82% for men.
To sum up, married women show near-universal participation in unpaid domestic work, and their early investments in learning rarely translate into earning opportunities. This underscores how women are yet to break many barriers—or rather, how they still lack a conducive environment to bridge the gap between education and the labour market.
Shuja Asrar contributed to this story.
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